he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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