New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
