out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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