I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
