Your mouth is God's brothel.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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