I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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