You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize