Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Randomize