I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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