Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
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