so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
