Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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