I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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