I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
