Can Purell be used as lube?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Little spoons don't ask big questions
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola