I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
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he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
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