I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
