in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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