it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
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Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
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Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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