When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize
