You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
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He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
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I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize