Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
