Whod you bang
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
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He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
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It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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