I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
