He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
