i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Also, beer. Big fan.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
