a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
