Joe is yelling at the trees again.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
