wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Life is so much better after having sex.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
