I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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