We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize