theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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