you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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