I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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