I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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