Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
