I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize