Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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