If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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