Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
True strength comes from lack of pants
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
