the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
