Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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