I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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