you guys were way drunker than both of me
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Two words: blizzard sex
Randomize
