NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I believe in your delicious
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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