just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
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