How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
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