She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
