I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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