My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
it was like eating out sand paper
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
