He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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